The Yes Lab - Grab Bag items

Click on a link below to get some of our weirdness, and to help us launch helpful bedlam! You can specify what you'd prefer to see in your grab bag, and we'll do our best to accommodate. But no promises. If we can't give you what you want, we'll throw in stuff you don't want, in a sincere bid to make you happy. (For other rewards see complete goodies list.)
    $25 "fancy" grab bag - One fancy thing (indicate which one you'd like when you fill out your Paypal page, and we'll do our best) and, like, 2 or so little things.


    $50 "unique" grab bag - One unique thing (let us know which you'd like—as usual, we'll do our best), plus a couple of little things


    $80 "double-mashup" grab bag -  Same as above, but even more little things.

    $100 "royal" grab bag - Just say what you want. We'll also throw in a bunch of stuff you don't want.

Note: shipping within North America is included—for other locations please add $10.

 

Grab Bag Particulars:

Fancy things. These things are not actually fancy. But they are things. And they weigh more than the less-fancy things. Well, except for the videos. And the posters.

  • The Yes Men Fix the World DVD. A good date movie, signed and then doodled upon.
  • The Yes Men DVD. Another good date movie, also signed and then doodled upon.
  • The Yes Men Fix the World movie poster. Doodled upon, perhaps in an embarrassing manner, and then signed.
  • Korean movie poster. No picture available, but it's awesome!
  • Identity Correction Poster. Fun sort-of-instructional poster on how to catch corporate criminals with their pants down. Doodling and signature appropriate for children.
  • The Yes Men book. Signed, with a fortune. Read all about how the Yes Men got started, the trials and tribulations they faced early on, their paranoias and manic dreams, etc. Each book is signed with a unique fortune, as if it were some kind of heavy, toxic cookie. May come with random mystery items lost through the pages.
  • The Yes Men Activity Book. Signed, doodled, etc. The book includes Survivaball-making instructions, fake press passes, lots of pictures, and some writing by smart people about what it is the Yes Men are trying to do. It's also a catalog of the "retrospective exhibition" of the Yes Men that's traveling around the country. Weird, we know.
  • "Season's greetings from the Yes Men" video. Not sure why you'd want this, but there you have it! Not gonna tell you anything else.
  • Etc. We have other fancy things—but we can't quite remember what they are. If you have any suggestions, we'll entertain them.

 

Little things. Or little-ish things. Anyhow, they weigh less, generally. A lot less, usually.

  • "Judgment Daymini-comic book about the Yes Men by Rebecca Migdal. Join Andy and Mike in their adventure on the high seas. There's just one problem out there: there's nothing to eat. Or drink. And even if there were, it would help to destroy the planet! Will appear in WWIII Comics shortly.
  • Fake New York Times. Our November 2008 Good-News-We-Want-to-See Edition. Handed out to "millions" of copies, if you believe the media. (The full true story, incidentally, is one of the DVD extras.)
  • Fake New York Post. Fake tabloid, 100% truth, handed out on the street during Climate Week in September 2009.
  • "Worried about climate change?" Survivaball pamphlets. Great for handing out on streetcorners to explain to passersby how they can't afford the stupidest costume known to mankind.
  • Lufthansa's "Deportation Class" brochures. These brochures advertising Lufthansa's Deportation Class service were placed in numerous Lufthansa airplanes in 1999. In Andy's first public imposture, he attended Lufthansa's Munich shareholder meeting and claimed to have been horrified at finding such a brochure under his first-class seat.
  • Dow Chemical's Live Earth Run For Water brochure. Just released! Was the pamphlet of choice at this year's tastelessness-award-winning event.
  • "Let's Go Republican" brochures. Guide for getting delegates to the 2004 RNC lost in Manhattan.
  • USA Patriot Pledge brochures. Passed out during the 2004 elections to many Bush voters. Didn't quite work.
  • "Try 'em" 52 Most Wanted War Criminals card game. Invented by the Yes Men in 2004. Convoluted, nearly unplayable rules included. (Can also be used as a regular ol' deck of cards.)
  • Reggie Vivoleum candleholders. Designed to prevent melting human fuel from getting on your hands. The fancy word for these things is "bobèches"—we learned that from our saint-repairer friend George while we were making them.
  • B'eau-Pal water bottle labels. Make your own bottle of filthy, toxic water from the groundwater under the world's nastiest toxic event—still never cleaned up. See how Dow executives react.

 

Fairly unique things. These are things used in, or accumulated during, Yes Men actions, or Yes Men travels, or whatever. Some of these things, despite being stupid, are on tour as part of a cool art show. If the item you want is on tour, we'll send you a picture and then the item itself after it's done touring the country.

  • Inflatable globes. "Offering the world a helping hamburger" inflatable globes. These were inflated and hurled at students in Plattsburgh during the Yes Men's infamous "poo" lecture.
  • Scottish riding hats. Worn for think-tank interviews (one checkered, one plain). (One of these is "on tour.")
  • Surfer Dude wig and Commander-in-Chief wig package (no wig). One of these is on tour. Guess which.
  • Think tank business cards. You can become the proud associate of one of the minds that's hell-bent on eliminating labor laws, any vestige of health care, climate control measures, etc. Who will be yours?
  • Calgary oil conference paraphernalia. This is some swag we accumulated at the Go Expo Conference where we introduced the world to Vivoleum™. May include one of the following, depending on supplies:
    • Oil industry, cola-flavored condoms. Fizz not included
    • Westmin Oil Belt Buckle (on tour)
    • Tourism Calgary DVD
    • Etc.
  • More Calgary stuff. This stuff was given us by friends, not oil people.
    • Calgary dollars.
    • Calgary Folk Music Festival CD.
    • Etc.
  • Dow name badge. Actually used by one of us, somewhere. Who knows where?
  • Press about the Yes Men's past actions. We have two big drawers full of this stuff—please take some.
  • Halloween contact lenses (blue and amber, 2 pairs). A failed attempt to upgrade Survivaballs with "laser eye beams" for the New York Halloween parade.
  • New Life Copenhagen book. Guide on how not to piss off your friendly Denmark home-stays while convening for the super over-hyped world climate conference (COP15). Includes areas for journal entries.
  • "Green Issue" of American Way magazine. Yes, American Way is an airline magazine. Yes, this is their "green" issue. You got it. (On tour.)
  • Dog News catalog. We got this as a sample from a printing company. They ended up printing the fake New York Times (which they printed).
  • Sputnik, free Russian/American Ad Review. See Dog News for explanation.
  • Blue and Yellow beaded necklace. Worn by the Yes Men during an aborted scene that really oughtn't to be seen by anyone, ever.
  • Crispy anchovies with sesame. Like Scoobie Snacks, but for Yes Men.
  • Parson's Pocket Map. With location of secret Yes Men headquarters marked with an X.
  • Kirgizstan tourism video. We hate to say it, but this is a real-life Borat situation. Must be seen to be believed. (Note: this video is currently misplaced. no idea where it is. But it's bound to show up.)
  • TckTckTck pin. Acquired during the Age of Stupid Global Green Premiere. Heather Graham liked it. We probably have a bunch of other such stuff as well.
  • Che Guevara poster. Just what it sounds like. No idea where it came from (not Cuba).
  • Tim DeChristopher poster. "Dare to do things worthy of imprisonment if you mean to be of consequence." Famous eco-activist who successfully monkey-wrenched a Utah land auction by bidding on land against the oil and gas industry.
  • Head lamp. Not working, but once used for descent into the Paris catacombs by Andy and friends.
  • A big roll of "caution tape." Can conveniently be used to cordon off entire streets for impromptu celebrations, for example.
  • UNAFF Grand Jury Award (broken). We really did win this, but it broke in transit. (On tour.)
  • Really nice women's watch (working). No idea where this came from, but it's a really nice watch and it works.
  • Empty bottle of Zwack Unicum. A strange Hungarian drink that Andy and Mike discovered in 1998 and now drink for extra courage when the going gets tough. (On tour.)
  • NRN Banking Services for Non Resident Nigerians pamphlet. No idea what this is. Maybe for Shell executives? (On tour.)

 

Ridiculously heavy things. We don't blame you for wanting these things. But they're heavy.

  • Green streetlight. Andy asked for, and obtained, this working green light from actual Manhattan street repairmen. You can actually put the two little wires into an electrical socket and it'll turn on. Careful!
  • 1960s-era airplane phone. Scavenged by Andy from an airplane junkyard near Tucson, Arizona.
  • 1960s-era airplane radio box. Same scavenging situation.

Etc. We have sooooo many other fairly unique things in our office. We'll keep adding to this list as we find things, and then there will be more things to ask for.

Note: Most of the above items come from here: